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بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
Ya Allah,
Jadikanlah anak kami anak yang soleh dan solehah ya Allah. Yang menyejukkan mata kami memandangnya ya Allah. Jadikanlah anak kami ahli syurga ya Allah. Dorongkanlah hati mereka untuk melakukan amalan amalan yang membawa mereka ke syurga Mu ya Allah. Jauhkanlah hati mereka daripada melakukan amalan amalan yang membawa mereka ke neraka Mu ya Allah. Tetapkan lah hati mereka untuk menunaikan solat. Janganlah Kau melalaikan mereka dengan perkara perkara yang tidak berfaedah ya Allah.

Ya Allah,
Kami tidak mampu untuk mengawasi anak anak kami setiap waktu ya Allah. Kami serahkan anak kami untuk berada dibawah penjagaan Mu ketika mereka tidak bersama kami ya Allah. Gerakkanlah hati mereka untuk berada di tempat tempat yang Engkau redhai. Dan jauhilah mereka daripada berada di tempat tempat yang Engkau murkai.

Ya Allah,
Perkenankanlah doa doa kami ini. Kami memohon kepada Mu kerana Engkaulah tuhan kami. Kami meminta kepada Mu kerana Engkaulah yang menciptakan kami. Kami merayu kepada Mu kerana Engkaulah yang Maha Mengkabulkan doa doa kami ini. Jika Engkau tidak memakbulkan doa kami ini, siapa lagi yang akan memakbulkannya. Jika Kau tidak mendengar doa kami ini, siapa lagi yang akan mendengarnya.
Bantulah kami ya Allah. Ya Rahman. Ya Rabbul Alamin.
......................... ..........................

Monday, January 17, 2011

it's the season to be weddEd

Adat merisik ("Spying" custom)

A Malay wedding begins with the adat merisik - the traditional Malay way for arranging marriages. Whether it is a love match, or a match made by family members who look around to identify a number of potential brides, the merisik, or investigation process, needs to take place.

Watching old movies and listening to love tales from the past, there would usually be pantuns (idiomatic expressions) as the 'opening act' or 'ice-breaker' to ask whether the girl has been spoken for or otherwise. Full of flowery expressions, it goes something like this:

"Membawa jamung terbakar hangit,

Bara melenting jatuh ke laman,

Hajat menggunung harapan melangit,

Ingin menyunting bunga di taman".

Though it is still practiced at some places, most folks would just skip all the ornate languages; getting straight down to business is much preferred nowadays.

For the merisik, one or more representatives (wakil) of the man's family would visit to the woman's family. In the past, the visit is purely for the purpose of further investigation, and gives the visitors the chance to see and assess the woman's suitability as the man's future wife.

Now, it is more of a formality for the families to get to know one another and to fix a proper date for the engagement. However, following the visit, both sides can begin to think more seriously about the possibility of a marriage.

Adat meminang

Once agreement for the marriage has been reached between the families of the potential bride and the potential bridegroom, preparations for meminang (engagement) take place. Representatives from the young man's side will once again visit the house of the young woman, following the confirmation of a date and time for such a visit.

On the side of the potential bride, a consensus is obtained regarding the following, among them are - the date and time for the meminang ceremony, the amount of money to be paid by the young man for wang belanja (expenses), details regarding the hantaran (gift) items and others. You may compare the process to football - there's a "penalty" should one of the parties break the agreement for the marriage. This just goes to show that marriage is serious business.

On the day of the engagement, the young man's party will bring the items agreed upon. The couple will be represented not by their parents but by other carefully selected persons, often senior relatives.

Here, the date for the akad nikah (wedding ceremony) and various other conditions and requirements will be also confirmed by both parties. Once all such matters have been resolved, the man's representatives will hand over all the hantaran (gift) items, except for the engagement ring. The ring will be placed on the finger of the potential bride by an elder sister or aunt of the potential bridegroom. The potential bride will be in her chamber while this is all happening.

Preparations Aplenty

"Marriage is a wonderful invention; but then again so is a bicycle repair kit," so says British comedian Billy Connely.

But weddings are certainly no laughing matter, and the preparations for the wedding are often hectic at best.

A Malay wedding is often being compared to a community project done in the spirit of gotong-royong (community). Without a doubt, there's a lot of work to be done before the grand feast - setting up temporary camps, kitchen shed, nuptial chamber, the dais, decorations and the list seems endless.

The Big Day

Upon the big day, in the midst of everybody running around attending to the business, the couple will solemnise their marriage according to Islamic laws. A Kadi (religious man) and two witnesses, along with families and relatives are present for the solemnisation. The Kadi will also give a brief talk on marital responsibilities before marrying the couple.

Followed by a prayer, the groom then puts a ring on his bride's finger and go through the membatal air sembahyang session. After that, the groom will be allowed to touch the bride's hands as it is now rightful and legal for the man to touch the woman who has become his wife.

Pay Up Before Entering

The bersanding day will see the groom arriving with his entourage to the sounds of beating kompang drums and bunga manggar (decorative flower parade). They are welcomed by a shower of beras kunyit (yellow-coloured tumeric rice) and a Silat (Malay martial arts) performance.

In states like Pahang and Johor, the groom has to bargain with the womenfolk of the house before they agree to release his bride. After paying the 'toll' (a certain amount of money to let him pass), the groom is then allowed to sit on the pelamin (dais) with his bride.

For those who don't have a clue on what to do at the menepung tawar (blessing of the couple with rose water and other substances) ceremony, look for a pedestal tray in front of the couple, which contains plates of beras kunyit, bertih (fried rice grains) and rose water, and follow the instructions by the helpful Mak Andam on how to bless the couple with those materials.

Friday, January 7, 2011

i'm totally in love with u,K.....

holla....setelah sekian lama berkawan...akhirnya saye telah memilih kamu sebagai pendamping saye...macammane lah slame nie tak penah lak perasan yang kamu sentiasa berada di samping saye? sentiasa berada di antara saya dan peristiwa penting dalam hidup saye....

10 tahun kite berkawan....slame nie saye tak endahkan awak pon..tapi awak cool....saye ade bf awak ok..awak de problem awak citer kat saye..tak kesah problem sal gf ke,sal kije je..semua problem lah bak kate pendeknye....

dan akhirnya skrg...setelah berfikir panjang...n kawan2 ramai menasihati dan merekemenkan kamu....akhirnya saye terima kamu........memang payah hati nie nak terima perubahan yang berlaku sekarang nie....tapi..saye bersyukur..awak slalu support saye dalam ape keadaan pon...saye sangat gumbire..tak terkata...

dengan kawan-kawan saye pon awak ley geng..mungkin awak perlu beri saye mase untuk bergaul dengan kawan-kawan awak..well..saye nie pemalu orangnyer....kene terimalah saye seadanyer yeap..

start tahun baru,bermulalah kisah baru...perancangan baru...azam baru....dan saye harap..ape yang kite rancang...akan berjalan dengan lancar.....saye akan berdoa banyak2 untuk dipermudahkan jalan bagi kite berdua.....

tapi hari nie.....mungkin sebab saye letih kot..jadi touching sket...tetibe lak rase sedey....bese kua sokmo dengan awak kan...pahtu hari nie..plan dop jadi...agak dissapointed lah di situ...not a big deal to me but when it comes to feeling......i cannot will come naturally.....hurm...sori sebab dah wat awak serba salah........

n sebagai penutupnyer untuk post kali nie....
saye just nak kabo ke awak.....saye sayang awak sangat-sangat....
bercinta dan berkongsi impian dengan awak...ibarat mimpi jadi realiti.......
dan saye berharap..segala impian kita akan tercapai......insyaAllah....amin....